Going down Morgan with Janko, Jerko, and Jerry, We downed our Pils, and over at the South Shore, they sipped their sherry. I opened my Kaiserized speller to learn what they know:. Nurse killers, annex...
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1. 1917 2. A Candymaker's Knife In My Handbag A night out in the tropics. Turned out i couldn't cope. After the school of fancy cookery. With antoinette pope. I learned brazing and saucing, meringue and sift. Knead, flute and flour. Each thu...3. Asthma Attack I woulda had a asthma attack. If I seen the shark bite back. I woulda had a asthma attack. If I seen the shark bite back. Yeah it's paradise island I know. Yeah yeah yeah I been there before. Onc...4. Automatic Husband Thanks for asking. Yes it's true, we've been waiting for you. We've been waiting for you. Persuade your husband he should stay at our disposal for today and take down everything we sa...5. Benton Harbor Blues As I try to fill all of my empty days, I stumble round on through my memory's maze;. of all my past, only the sadness stays. I went moping down by the bridge;. I rode a bike in the snow to the mi...6. Birdie Brain I hate the steam train that whistles woozy my bird brain, That sends my spaniel insane. And I’ll stop riding side saddle if they don’t stop the clickity clattle, I’ll jump in the...7. Bitter Tea I've got a special category business. down by the Multifunctional Dr. Sun Yat-Sen Memorial Rollerblade Rink--. down by the Home of Bitter Tea. Bitter, bitter, bitter tea;. bitter bitter, bitter...8. Black-hearted Boy Darling black-hearted boy, all the color's gone out of my ribbon loom. as I've only got the worst to assume. Take your sheet metal sheers;. cut a slit up the the side of my dark blue dress;....9. Blueberry Boat Pontoon put-put with the tape on 10. Dixie cup pink wine in the Labor Day sunshine. I’m sliding the sunfish up through the wakes. Coming up too quick, making mistakes. Quiet climb the chrome la...10. Borneo I was so bored with my old life;. I was so bored with decent odds. My new roommate left her debit card:. some sort of test for me. It's too hard. Try to run an errand. Nervous sweat. I rush bac...11. Bow Wow Down in the dumps. Me and the seagulls we were looking for lumps. They all get scared when off of one of the bumps: jumps. I have to clutch. I have to tell him his commands all in Dutch. He likes his...12. Bright Blue Tie On my first day in town we saw the king. He was dressed in a suit with a bright blue tie. And it matched his eyes. And when ours met I sighed. Took a boat or a ferry to an island. There were gardens a...13. Cabaret Of The Seven Devils Disregard for how and where and. with whom. You amuse yourself encourages bad behavior. The Duke, as was appropriate, held himself in high regard, And therefore considered himself in need of encourage...14. Charmaine Champagne She’s gonna get me folked up, fairly beat. She likes a strong Sangaree that shakes. for 12 hours at least. She’s gonna get me folked up, fairly beat. And teach me not to get baited with....15. Chief Inspector Blancheflower I wanted to be a typewriter mender when I grew up, But things didn’t work out so. Sleep. Late in the morning, climb up Mt. Olympia and replace a Return:. But I didn’t get enough good g...16. Chris Michaels Later at lunch with the taco lettuce crunch crunch. She sets herself apart the bunch. How bad does she seem?. She makes me wanna scream. On the phone with the West Glen Ellen rest home. Talking up a t...17. Clear Signal From Cairo It’s a clear, it’s a clear, it’s a clear, it’s a clear, it’s a clear, it’s a clear, clear signal from Cairo. Calling me back to your arms. Calling me back to...18. Cousin Chris Back the bus he cussed “Space suits! Blackened boots!. Lad, little Lad,” he sad, “I’ve a tip for you:. See, what about me: what about her? What about me?”. For five...19. Crystal Clear At 4:00. Just after work. I got my check. I held my breath. The phone wrings tell them I ain't never here. The over under. Made a blunder. I gave my cell phone. To my cousin. He plays the threats...20. Cut The Cake When I heard the news. I nearly lost my breath. My heart stopped. And I held my chest. How could it be true, how could it. be true?. I bought ten copies of the paper. Tried to buy them all. But they w...21. Does It Remind You Of When How the years have gone. It's come to this. A rose on his lapel, in the open coffin i'd give him a kiss. I have to go up north to play at his funeral. And his wife is there. In some chapel s...22. Don't Dance Her Down Don't dance her down boys. Don't dance her down. Don't dance her down boys. Her man's in town. I played cards in England. I threw dice in Spain. I'm going back to England. To...23. Drive To Dallas If I see you tomorrow. I don’t know what I will do. I’m not going to cut my hair or run. around the block. I’m not going to drive to Dallas with. blurry eyes ever again. With wind...24. Duplexes Of The Dead I went on down to the duplexes of the dead. Where the shades are drawn and the shadow’s shut. Unless you know the magic word, seldom said but often heard. Bite your lip then spin around three t...25. Even In The Rain You wore your wrestling badge from your. wrestling match. You wore a t-shirt over your suit that. says you just won State. I guess I still don’t mind that you. were late. I guess we must have d...26. Evergreen I was wielding my axe. Drank whiskey at the bar. Every night coming home. Out the windshield of my car. I would look through my boughs. And think I saw my lucky star. I was spreading my sheets. Took d...27. Ex-guru One of those blonde ladies had a certain hold on me. I went to all her seminars by the Airport in the Double Tree. I even let her use nephew's sea plane in the Bahamas for free. But she means not...28. Forty Eight Twenty Three Twenty Second Street Now, as for my aunt. Who told on me. She was always wearing her turbans. Sailing back to Greece on the Normandy. Having dinner at the captain's table. Sitting on the deck with 5 men surrounding h...29. Gale Blow Gale, gale blow. Gale, gale blow. My umbrella can't take it you know. Been caught in a hail storm. A blizzard tornado's nose. But nothing, no nothing. Can beat this gale blow...30. Guns Under The Counter "well, good for you. But we have something too. ". So said my aunt. A bowling alley and lunch counter. Filled with fellas on their lunch break. From the western electric plant at a slant acr...31. Here Comes The Summer Last day in May the afternoon. Remember. Black marks of charcoal from the dune. Remember. I thought it wouldn't be too soon. We'll wait at least until it's June. The twenty-ninth of Mar...32. I'm Going Away I’m going away, I’m going away. I’ll be back some old day. I’m going away, I’m going away. I’ll be back some old day. Please tell me man what more can I do. L...33. I'm Gonna Run I slit my wrist with my swing line. Copied myself 500 times. I pierced my ears with a three-hole punch. Ate twelve dozen doughnuts for lunch. So next week I'ma walk. Next week I'ma walk. And...34. I'm In No Mood I'm in no mood to comb my hair:. There's a chill in the air. And it's catching. Catching. I was so drunk last night, i didn't even undress for bed. And i swear the pin in my hair g...35. In My Little Thatched Hut In my little thatched hut. where blue-green grass grows by the brook. I lounge and I look. (I lounge and I look. I lounge and I look). for my own true love to return--. to come rowing in his rowboat...36. Inca Rag/name Game In the cracker barrel dumpster I found a bag. Red white striped I opened it--gag. Mummy day pizarro dressed in a Inca rag. Call on in to work quick. Tell 'em that I'm seasick. Uncle Ricky&ap...37. Japanese Slippers Down at the shell shed, the boys are picking at their pearls. The hole in my mitten lets the rain get in. I bought 22 ounces from the petrol park, waiting at the light. I’m never going to make...38. Keep Me In The Dark The Bazaar in Ouarzazate, Had an emerald for sale. We heard. In the silver band were etched the initials. of you know who. His momma pawned the Gulfstream;. Returned the antiquities to Italy;. Said i...39. Leaky Tunnel I pulled my kerchief out of my pocket. Wiped my nose and said hello. I bought a tambourine at the millennium dome. It jangled 2000 times in a row. I caught a cold when I was way down south. Standing o...40. Lost At Sea There was a time I was proud to be me. But now I’m all. Lost at sea. There was a time when I couldn’t. complain. But now it’s you. I only blame. Baby I’m…. Maybe I...41. Mason City Came a card marked Mason City. From my forwarder. Shut the door, don’t let my dad see;. Read aloud dear sir:. Understanding you account an upright gent-. lemen Aetna Life agreed and lent. As ag...42. My Dog Was Lost But Now He's Found …I kicked my dog. I was mean to him before. I guess that’s why he walked out my door. I really wish I could see him some more. I looked under the mats and I asked all the cats. I went to...43. My Egyptian Grammar I never thought it could have happened to me. But on the morning of my eldest daughter's. Second wedding, I blacked out. They said it was just stress, but I didn't think so:. I couldn't...44. Navy Nurse I got warnings from jealous friends;. Cases of borrowed clothes. And a vial of Dramamine from my mother. And she said, "Forget what mom likes. 'cause things have changed";. Taught me ho...45. Nevers There's a town I know called Nevers, no Nevers. never wasn't was what it weren't. when it wasn't once. Knew Nevers?. Knew Nevers?. Nothing never I'll ever learnt. There'...46. Norwegian Wood (this Bird Has Flown) I once had a girl, or should I say, she once had me. She showed me her room, isn't it good, norwegian wood?. She asked me to stay and she told me to sit anywhere, So I looked around and I noticed...47. Oh Sweet Woods I was in Tahoe, on the California side, waiting in the lobby at 665 1/2 Frontage Road. when two extra-blond short sleeve button-down. white-shirt blue-tie mystery Mormons. came in and put this music o...48. Paw Paw Tree At last when the choice was neither nor, Bottom of the bay we’re set ashore. Went into town beg what we lack:. 200 stripes on horseback. Wearing my yellow coat, Rope tied around my throat:. Gre...49. Police Sweater Blood Vow Forget the dogs and forget the sheep-. it's only you who affects me. On the fun fair track road, a helter skelter fall, on my ice skater's bruised knees. Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep. tel...50. Pricked In The Heart Listen, these are not as drunken as. you suppose. It might not be 3 o'clock in the morning. like it seems:. The little children will be prescient. And your young men will see shows, And your old...51. Quay Cur I had a locket, a little silver charm, Given to me so to keep me out of harm. Canvasing the quayside trying to earn my keep, A killick tore it off my neck and threw it in the deep. And now I'll n...52. Ray Bouvier Ray Bouvier made me shoot the shoe. He won the local lottery and took us out. We put a barricade down the middle. of the bed. But that didn’t stop me from looking. down the barrel. Well I thoug...53. Rehearsing My Choir But there was one other man with whom i didn't get along. The bishop. Would head down, head down to deerport station. To see what stars on the silver screen might be seen. Or broadway stage were...54. Restorative Beer She tells me about last night and her 103rd first date (she counted). And she counted her pairs of pants again. I've only got 53, minus the ones I've got on. I want a restorative beer. So I...55. Right By Conquest If you wish to wait until dusk I respect your policy. But by all means, my liege, lay siege, lay siege, or whatever else you might want to call it. We. Would only be restoring to the rightful from be...56. Rub-alcohol Blues Troubles up and down the road. And trials all the way around. Never knew what trouble was. Till my honey threw me down. With nothing but old ragged clothes. My heartstrings broken to shreds. Blues cre...57. Seven Silver Curses My little sister had a glass of wine. No doubt a glass of wine too many. "I bet he's out right now with his Nazi whore. That's right, I said it, that's what she is, and when he. Fi...58. Sing For Me Sing for me, my daughter, sing for me. When I’m away you’ll be the siren that will finally lead me home. The girl around her father throws her arms to make him stay:. “My daddy de...59. Single Again I married a man, oh then. I married a man, oh then. I married a man. He was the plague of my life. Oh and I wish I was single again. I wish I was single again. 'Cause when I was single my pockets...60. Slavin' Away Slavin' away. All for you my love. And i've nothin to show for it. Cept my dusty old book full of pictures. A dusty old book. Tell me a story. Bout how i wasn't so tired. From my slavin...61. South Is Only A Home Can I feel useless and low?. Could I hide a chain of gold from your eyes?. Sandy thinks he knows the trade. All the games and the plays. And the ways I make. Do you believe in the first way to lend a...62. Spaniolated I was 18 years old just a research volunteer;. I walked home from the TCBY each night with no fear. One particular starry 11 o’clock. I went down by the water;. an old man with a burlap bag. sa...63. Staring At The Steeple You followed me to Manchester. To meet the guy who says my name. You heard him say my name. You heard him say my name. And now you gotta know where he. stands from. Inside a booth or behind a desk. Or...64. Straight Street Tea time at Damascus computer cafe, I'm looking busy and staring off the other way. Leverkusen, Juventus; Leeds vs. Valencia:. I'm over-hearing all their nonsense in extensia. They're...65. Sullivan's Social Slub Brandy Buttersotch bartered and begged. Many Motherwell mustered and mugged. Lucy Liverspots lied oh! And legged. Danny Dungerees digged and he dugged. So’s’on Saturday say slips’...66. Sweet Spots Well I stuffed my stuff into a sport sac and I took the Lake St. El. Well I got off Cicero and I snuck in through one of the loading docks. And I smiled as I sucked my gem I mean to take a room at th...67. Take Me Round Again Take me round again. in the Wildwood where the Bluebells grew. With the Merry widow waltz singing. take me back to New York town. When the birds in Georgia sing of. Tennessee. Fifty miles from Boston....68. Teach Me Sweetheart Come away;. teach me, sweetheart. Come on past, brave young bachelors. I'm alone;. teach me, sweetheart. My mother in law was standing by the stove. hissing like a snake, hissing like a snake, hi...69. The End Is Near The end is near. The end is near, the time has come:. There ain’t no way–. Nobody will save you now. The end is near, The end is near. The time has come:. Don’t even think. That...70. The Garfield El Faster, hammers. Faster, hammers. Churn and turn into my late train to my lost love. Ring away today, stick, bruise into my felt, or so I felt. I found a skeleton tooth in the junk drawer. And I mean...71. The Old Hag Is Sleeping My Baby's angry. He's always so angry;. He smiles only when he can give me abuse. What's the use. What's the use?. The church bells are busted again. And at cakewalk class I&apos...72. The Philadelphia Grand Jury There ain’t no more favors to ask. There ain’t no petitions to pass. It’s all in the hands. It’s all in the hands. Of the Philadelphia Grand Jury now. More crooked sons of...73. The Vietnamese Telephone Ministry I thought myself an unworthy thing, despairing of my case all the time boys. I thought myself an unworthy thing, despairing of my case all the time boys. Damn it all, damn it all to hell. Damn it all,...74. The Wayward Granddaughter He said "Come on now babe. Let's take a little drive. Go slumming down the Carson's in my black X-5. ". Samples from the Clinique counter and up the escalator. And then a knowing g...75. Though Let's Be Fair Though let’s be fair. I had other loves before my husband. Other sweethearts. Tom Kitsos, for instance. And another I won’t mention. I loved him truly, or so I thought. Turned out in ano...76. Tropical Ice-land Goat's head in the deli case. Oh sweet angel-angel-bearded face. Paper maché parade on at night. That's what you do with no sunlight. In the tropical tropical. Tropical ice-land. Bleak...77. Turning Round Catamaran Man you’re my cousin you’re my blood you’re ten feet tall. and tan from the sun after sailing all day you sleep in your car. throw the cushions on the floor and listen t...78. Two Fat Feet Slip me out of my northern noose. My easter egg. My western wheel. And a snouthern snake. I've got a busted breast and a jiggly thigh. A rumpled roast and a raggedy eye. A floppy neck and two fat...79. Up In The North Wearing my scarf and my hat. And I squint and I sniff as I went around. Walked up the road through the woods. By the pines, by the lake as I heard the sound. Maria Anna Gamisou. Daughter of a dire in...80. Waiting To Know You I’m…waiting to know you by the way. Send up the balloons, its right to assume yea. I’m waiting to know you by the way. Set up to the pier, wait till you get here yea. And when I...81. We Got Back The Plague That easy going man of blood. Mucking about in the McLennan County mud. If you're hoping he won't, well course then he must. Driving his truck through the McLennan County dust. I read in my...82. We Wrote Letters Everyday Well, no one was too upset. You know we were married in the war. And I went with him to Pennsylvania and California. But he went out the Pacific. And I came back to Chicago to work on the railroad. An...83. Whistle Rhapsody The isolated lady, an isolated older lady;. a dignified dame who keeps her own counsel, in love with the out-of-the-way;. identifying with the unfamiliar, contemptuously turns her back on the wicked w...84. Wicker Whatnots Emma was walking with Mandeep and JingJing on the second day of Spring. Emma was walking with Mandeep and JingJing on the second day of Spring. She said she was sick of her porch pillars and golden ax...85. Widow City Antioch agent wrote a letter per usual. Dated it's 100 degrees perpetual, Sent via the swift dromedary traversing her ways. On the odd and even days. It said the lion's come up from his thic...86. Wolf Notes Pick up your trumpet, your plastic pretend trumpet:. blow me your horn today. Pick up your tambourine, your Fisher Price My First Tamborine:. jingle and jangle today. Plug in your keyboard, your symph...87. Worry Worry Never let one man worry your little mind. Don't you never let one man worry your little mind. He'll keep you troubled troubled worried yeah. Worried all the time. He'll keep you trouble...